Miss America Cheslie Kryst’s Memoir "By The Time You Read This" Describes Her Tryst with Depression before Her Tragic Death
Miss America 2019 Cheslie Kryst's memoir, co-written with her mother, reveals her struggles with depression and online trolling before her tragic suicide.
Miss America 2019, Cheslie Kryst, suffered from high functioning depression and imposter syndrome for years. On January 30, 2022, at the age of thirty, she tragically passed away due to suicide in New York.
By The Time You Read This: The Space Between Chelsie’s Smile And Mental Illness is a memoir penned by Cheslie, in her own words, where she describes her struggles before she had taken the extreme step.
The memoir is co-written by Cheslie’s mother April Simpkins. It brings to light the mental health conditions Cheslie was suffering from.
Prior to ending her life, she wrote a letter to her mother expressing her last desire to publish her memoir.
It is difficult to fathom that a talented, young girl with a law degree, an MBA degree, won the coveted Miss America title, and who had a bright future ahead of her, decided to end her life! Kryst felt that she “wasn’t good enough” and that she “didn’t belong” here.
The memoir also states that she couldn’t handle the fame that came with winning the Miss America crown. She became a victim of toxic online trolling.
“Just hours after my win, I had to delete vomit-face emojis that a few accounts had plastered all over the comments on my Instagram page. More than one person messaged me telling me to kill myself”, Kryst wrote in her memoir.
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The toxic trolling sparked her imposter syndrome, heightened her insecurities and intensified her fears. She tried to focus on positive thoughts, but they didn't last for too long.
The memoir revisits the chilling moment when April received the text from her daughter saying that she won’t be alive. The mother kept reading the text again and again and “screamed from a place in my soul that I didn’t know existed.” April recounts her experience of coping after losing her beloved daughter.
By The Time You Read This is posthumously releasing today and the proceeds from the book will go to Cheslie C. Kryst Foundation, which offers mental health support for youth and young adults.
Cheslie Kryst’s tale is a strong reminder to embrace ourselves for who we are. The significance of mental health and the ill effects of online trolling are also emphasized.